fields of innocence ;


some blatantly left the game.
like bandits , you stole my heart away.
how could i say i'll not sway , when surge of happiness is flowing right through my spine.
let this fate intertwine.
let us find our way ,
just the both of us ,
we'll disappear on the glimmering sliver threading.



i looked again at the battered remains of the man who mean so much to me.

i'm having a very bad migrane now ):
i don't know it's migrane until isaac told me so.
aint i dumb? :D
hahaha , i think so.
got most of my results back today.
damned.
did considerably mediocre compared to the both pure classes.
21/100 for chinese.
please be so proud of me.
i don't know how i get it do.
only genius can do it.
alvin and i were competing to see who gets higher.
ultimately, i won (: (:
B3 for social studies and emath.
i could have gotten A2 for emath but i forgot to label graph and there goes my A2.
):
c5 for chemistry.
something i studied so super hard yet only a C5.
BUTBUTBUT , considering that only 11 people pass (: that's quite an encouragement .
heh.
A2 for english (:
happy and satisfied (:
F9 for addmath , expected.
failed my physics and i think i suck cause i could have passed. i think (:

so here's targets for eoy.
english : A2.
chinese (HEHE.) : c6
emath : A1/A2.
chemistry : B3
physics : B3
addmath: c6.
comb humans : B3/ B4

hahah , 4 more weeks to study hard (:

heehaw (: had netball inter-house just now.
we won two teams , so into finals with the ruggers this thursday.
netball was so tough yet fun today.
at that very instant when i was comtemplating to put in a shot when i was pretty far away from the ring ,
screams of "sophia just score" rang all around and suddenly someone shouted "sophia don't shoot!"
i was petrified i swear , but i put in a beautiful goal.
you know , it just feels great when everyone comes to you and goes like damned good sophia.
it rocks! (:
haha ,
i shall stop BOASTING :D
haha , i'm not.
headed home.
and pop , migrane.
goodnight people.


and hey , you know it saddens me so much to see the big change in you.
i'm speechless about you.
are you still you or a deformed you?

whispering gentle prayers everynight , making sure that of all people ,

the God above protects you first.

don't get me wrong , cause this might sound to you a bit odd.

you are but a memory , someone i miss and not love.

it's impossible to go through life without trials and struggles being thrown at you.

maybe sometimes we should just look back on that eventful day with a mixture of humour, immense gratitude and humility.

we've tried all life preserving maneuvers we could think of , running the gamut from practical to ridiculous.

but , what purposes are we driving at so hard to keep our lives the way we want.

complex.

the more you do it , the less simple it'll be.

we thought all that could alleviate our struggle.

but take another glance at the people living in squalor with dirty nappies littering the house and a foul stench of urine in the air ; a clear indication of near imminent death.

yet , we are tantalised by the rich scent lacing under our roofs.

fussing over the fabrics we wear.

no one saw how the columns that spelled our fortunes compared.

"even the very fury they lavished on each other was a brick in this unseen creation , a structure that reveals itself increasingly as the world falls apart."

yes, we said we'll do a part.

tomorrow? next month ? next year or never.

never did.

omg i felt so flattered in school today ,
by like ben sim, marvin, leonard , kelvin , alvin.
hahah , just because i've done my acids bases tys and understand like 80% of it , and have already started my kinematics tys and completed my sets tys with most of it correct.
you know today they just made me soar up to the sky.
hahah , but i'm rather proud of myself please.

1. i taught leonard cheng acids bases when our class genius couldn't get the answer too!
2. ben sim wants me to teach him sets
3. HI! xiaowei is here.ahhaahhahahahahaha.

and i don't know lah.

eeek , xiaowei and i are super eeeeeee-d with someone now.

booyaa!

the gayest thing is boredom i swear.
i've got a long list of things to study yet i'm just too lazy to get my ass on my desk's chair.
i just want to sit by the window and don't feel bored at all.
stupid isn't it? yes , people always want things in their own way & i just happened to be one of them.
okay , i'm really bored!
i'll go braddell to look for gwen later (: or maybe i'll meet roytong.
i'm indecisive indecisive indecisive! ]:
and yes , i ate durian puffs this morning .
yumm.


went kkh yesterday and this is what the doctor said >

>> doctor : are you still on hormone pills?

>> sophia : yes. does it makes me fat? i've been gaining alot of weight!

>> doctor : yes it does makes you put on alot of weight. but you're still so skinny.

>> sophia : no i'm not anymore! can you prescribe something else that won't make me gain weight?

>> doctor : okay , i'll give you oral contraceptives for one month's consumption.

>> sophia : oh wow , aint oral contraceptives for other purposes? and will it makes me lose weight to what i used to be?(giggles)

>> doctor : yes it's to prevent pregnancy like condom just that it's pills. BUT IT HELPS TP REGULATE MENSES TOO! so don't worry. you'll lose weight and get back to 44 kg alright. now go to the pharmacist and get your oral contraceptives.

& sophia ran excitedly to the pharmacist to get her miracle(:

and that stupid nurse measured my height wrongly.
it's 166cm and maybe because she's way shorter than me so she couldnt take the accurate height so it became 163cm!

sometimes you hold so tight , it slips right through your hand.

the labour of love we planted didn't culminate , did it?

maybe i've gotten accustomed to your presence , it just doesn't feel right being so hollow right inside.

i was downright stupefied when you brought me to the carousel ride and snow play.

it just felt like all our storms abated and on that very night , there are only two stars shining for you and i.

a notion to scream baby i love you baby i love you baby i love you.

do they understand what i mean when i say i love you?

no the world don't ,

cause the meaning of my love is really too esoteric for them.

just you and i ,

we'll succumb to the adoration we can't even douse.

till now , won't someone snap me back to the harsh reality.

it's like a thrust of heavy rocks , yet i don't feel the weight at all.

[:
hehehe hello!
i came back from indo on friday.
it was so fun so fun.
though karimun's like a really poor town , it's beyond comprehension how much i enjoyed myself there.
and most importantly , the kids that i taught were amazingly lovely.
the food , lodging and all were rather good.

irvin , shermaine and shandy.

my sugar rush.

i won't forget this entire trip i had with you sweet shids.

especially when we screamed and totally let our hair down in irvin's room.

imitating and posing like everyone.

and when all of us were so giddy on the ferry , we stood firm together and helped each other.

and through laughter and concern (and potato chips!) , we pulled through.

also , when we climbed mt jantan.

all so memorable.

three beautiful ladies , i'm awfully sorry that i've fallen for you!

& we'll have another good good time on the bed next trip to china okay!

<3

the best part of the trip.
omgomgomg.
the class of kids that i taught sang mungkin nanti for me! :D
i swear they're so lovely that i just wanna cuddle all of them tightly , but circumstances don't permit huh.
HAHAHA (:
anyhows , i took a video of them singing.
i'll upload when i have the time.
heheh , i can only remember this
> boleh saya ke tandas.
which means "may i go to the toilet please"
:D


have we ever wonder what we can do for them.
just a little bit of our love can be a whole lot of happiness to them.
& what is poverty when being happy is all matters.
the smile on their face is again beyond comparison to the materialism we have.


maybe i'm closing my door on you.
maybe i'm falling on deaf ears.
once again , it's easier said than done.

hey dickhead, maybe you should just STOP invading my damned privacy and stop going in as and when you like.
things like that were NEVER meant for you.
you're a flying pisser.
stop crossing my boundaries , because i don't like it.
& i'm getting really pissy with you.


; leaving for indonesia tomorrow.
GOD BLESS ME.
the trip doesn't sound a wee bit fadge.

i'm gonna miss that hot shid!
:D